Love, Friends and Family
by rippedunderwear
Summary: JJ/Prentiss Romance; I am new at this so bear with me. I don't own anything  except OC
1. Chapter 1

_I__ am__ drunk_. Her eyelids were heavy and her breathing was inconsistent. Her movements were erratic and she slurred when she spoke. She couldn't remember how long she had been sitting at the bar or how many drinks she had drunk. She looked at the barkeeper and gently tapped her cup. Reluctantly, he filled her another shot of bourbon. She took it, like a shot; too drunk to realize just how badly it burnt. She tapped her cup again but this time he just stared at her. She tapped one more time, this time more forcefully without ever breaking eye contact with her server.

"Ms. Prentiss, I think it is time that you went home." He said, almost scared at the woman's possible reaction. "I have called you a cab."

Emily quickly stood but before she had a chance to give her server a piece of her mind, she noticed his eyesight just slightly to the left of her. She quickly turned and the momentum of her two brisk movements caused her to slip. She looked up at a familiar looking woman. _Kate.__But__ it __can__'__t __be __Kate. __Kate __is __in __Africa._ The woman reached out her hand and Emily took it, not because she believe she needed the help- no, she was too proud for that- but because she needed to confirm that it was really Kate. _Kate._

"Let's go home, Emmy." Emily nodded as the tears she worked all night to suppress suddenly streamed down her face.

Kate carefully held Emily as they walked down the two blocks separating the bar from Emily's apartment. It was almost 2am and the streets were deserted. They walked in silence- the only sound being that of Emily's sobs. Kate never asked what was happening, she knew. Emily had confided in her six weeks ago that the woman she loved had just gotten engaged. That the woman she had loved for over a year was marrying someone else. Kate's heart ached for her friend, her best friend and former lover. She wanted to reach out to Emily, to kiss her, to tell her that everything was going to be okay. But she couldn't. Treating Emily as broken, even though it was clear she was indeed broken, would be a mistake. Therefore, Kate walked, in silence, hearing her friend cry and quietly utter the name of the woman who had broken her heart. _Jennifer._

Emily woke to sunlight streaming into her room. She couldn't remember getting home. _Shit._She cursed herself for drinking again- she had promised she was going to control herself. _Shit_. Her head hurt. _Shit!_ 10:27am. She was late for work. _Shit!_

She ran to her bathroom, quickly washing her face and brushing her teeth. _Shit,__I __look __like __shit._ She quickly threw on a pair of black slacks and a yellow sweater and that was the first time she realized that she was only wearing a bra and underwear. _Shit,__what__ the __hell __happened __last __night?_ For the first time that morning she stopped to think._ My__ alarm __didn__'__t __go __off. __Someone __must __have __disabled __it. __Last __night__'__s __clothes __are __neatly __folded __on __my __chair. __I __was __tucked __into __bed __under __my __sheets. __My __bathroom __was __humid __and __the __floor __was __wet-__someone __took __a__ shower __in __my __bathroom. __Kate! _Running downstairs Emily realized that the room smelled like coffee and bacon. Her blinds were open- she hadn't open them in six weeks. She closed them because they made her cry. _They __make me think __of __JJ._ Two suitcases were stacked at the bottom of the stairs. Emily slowly descended the rest of the stairs and was filled with joy at the sight of her best friend- the only person in the world she trusted with everything- reading a medical journal on her couch, drinking coffee. _Kate._

"There is coffee, pastries, omelet and bacon in the kitchen. Please make sure to eat something before you drink your coffee. Considering the fact that your bar tab was $247, I am assuming you are feel like shit." Kate says, without making eye contact with her friend.

"What…what are you doing here?" Emily asks instinctively walking to the kitchen and picking at the omelet Kate had left in the frying pan. Pouring herself a cup of coffee and taking the frying pan with her, Emily walked to the living room and sat on the coffee table directly in front of her friend.

"You had no food in the house, so I ran to the market and got us some food. Sorry, no provolone. Wow, you look like shit." Kate smiles and Emily can't help but smile. _I__ missed __you __Kate._

"What are you doing in D.C.?" Emily asks suddenly thinking about work again. _Shit,__I__ am __so __late._

The response was quick, as Kate knew this would be Emily's first question; "I am in between assignments so I am working at Memorial Hospital for three weeks."

"But you always go to New York. Why D.C.? " Emily asked, even though she knew the answer.

"Well, for the past six weeks my best friend has been calling me in the middle of the night stupid drunk because her heart was broken. I was worried. Besides, your mother asked me to check on you." Kate said, getting up to pour herself more coffee.

"My mother! Shit. I don't have time for this. I need to go to work. I am already really late. Why don't we meet for lunch? Can you come to Quantico?" Emily says rushing out the door.

"Don't bother!" Kate yells and Emily stops before she crosses the threshold of her front door. "I called work, told them you were sick weren't going to be able to make it. It seems that you have allowed your heartbreak to affect every part of your life because you boss didn't seem particularly surprised that you needed help and some time off."

Emily could feel all the gratitude she felt for Kate vanishing from her body. _How__ could __she __call __work?__ She __has __no __right__…_ Emily quickly slammed the door and marched back to the living room where her friend had again positioned herself on the couch with the medical journal.

Not looking up from the journal and before Emily had the chance to share her outrage, Kate calmly responded, "you are mess. You are a huge mess Emmy. And I can help. But you have to work with me. Jennifer is engaged to Will. That sucks and I wish it wasn't so. But it is. If you keep drinking yourself silly every night you are going to hurt yourself, not just physically and emotionally but professionally. By the concern in his voice, you boss knew that there was something wrong with you. You have never, never allowed anything to affect your professional life. It's been six weeks. It is time to move on and get your shit together."

"YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO CALL THE BAU. YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO PLACE YOURSELF IN MY LIFE! IT'S MY LIFE KATE, YOU DON'T JUST GET TO WALTZ IN AND SOLVE MY PROBLEMS. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. NOW!"

"No."

"What? I AM KICKING YOU OUT. YOU CAN'T JUST SAY 'NO!' I WANT TO BE ALONE AND I HAVE TO GO TO WORK. GET OUT. I NEED TO GO TO WORK." Emily was exasperated. She was frustrated that her life was a mess. She was frustrated that Kate knew her life was a mess. She was frustrated that apparently Hotch knew her life was a mess. Everything was falling apart and she couldn't do anything about it. She loved JJ but JJ was engaged. And straight. She allowed herself to fall for JJ and she had broken her heart without even knowing that Emily's heart was hers to break. Emily had been a coward and hidden her feelings for the blonde for over a year and now it was over. It was over before it started. JJ had agreed to marry Will. She was shaking, trying to keep herself from crying and she was mad. She was mad at Kate for making her realize the mess her life had become. She wanted her friend to leave and leave her alone but she was scared of being alone and she wanted Kate to help her. She couldn't understand what was happening to her. Her lack of control was starting to scare her. _This__ is __not __who __I__ am.__I __am __Emily __Prentiss __and __I__ am__ always __in __control __of __my __feelings._

"No." Kate said, calmly she knew Emily was mad but she was also unwilling to be shoved out of her friend's life. She has known Emily for over ten years. She knew that she had to ignore the anger and the façade to get to the brunette's real emotions. Hearing Emily kick her out was hurtful but she was there to help her friend and decided to ignore Emily's tantrum. "You should finish eating. We should leave before lunch hour rush hour. God, I hate driving around D.C." Kate had made a decision and she was not budging.

_Driving?_ "Where do you think we are going?" That was all Emily was able to get out before Kate lowered the journal, walked to her friend and gave her a hug. Emily fought at first but soon the tears started to roll down her face and she finally completed the hug. Emily cried for what felt like hours as her friend held her. When the brunette was done crying Kate walked into the kitchen, reheated the bacon and the omelet and gestured for Emily to sit at the breakfast bar. Emily ate in silence as Kate packed them a shared bag. It was Friday afternoon and they were only going to be returning to D.C. on Monday night.

As she packed, Kate explained that she had called the BAU as Dr. Kathryn Welsh and explained that Prentiss was ill. She had asked for the day off but Hotchner had explained that since two co-workers were at conferences this weekend, the team was grounded in D.C. at least until Tuesday morning. So he told Dr. Welsh to tell Prentiss that she could take a long weekend off.

When she was done eating, Emily took a quick shower, put on jeans, a t-shirt her leather jacket and followed Kate out the door, she still didn't know where they were going but it didn't really matter. She trusted Kate with her life and her life was broken. The redhead led the way out of the condo and into Emily's car. She moved around Emily's life with ease having stayed at the condo many times before, always in between her Medical Without Borders assignments. As the brunette settled in the passenger seat, she turned to her college friend and asked, "my mother called you?"


	2. Chapter 2

They didn't talk much during the drive. Kate had a conference call with Doctors Without Borders (DWB) for about an hour and Emily sat quietly listening to her friend and thinking about her life. She had worked very hard these past months not to think; to push through; expecting that eventually the hurt and pain would subside and she would be back to being who she was. _Well,__this __clearly __isn__'__t __working_, she thought with a small sarcastic chuckle_._ Even though she felt naked and exposed- especially after learning that even her mother knew something was wrong- she was happy to have Kate around. She knew Kate was the only person who could talk her off the plank she was walking on but she still resented the woman for knowing her so well. She was still hurt by Kate's intrusion into her life, calling her boss, talking to her mother, and just generally pointing out that her life was a mess. She knew her life was a mess but she wished others didn't.

The conference call was not going well and Kate spent most of her time correcting her colleagues. _She__ is __annoyed __they __aren__'__t __utilizing __local __resources __and __attempting __to __provide __local __legitimacy __to __their __work.__ She __is __annoyed__ that __they __aren__'__t __requiring __doctors __to __speak__ the __local __language. __She__ is __very annoyed._Listening to Kate so eloquently make her point, Emily couldn't help but smile at her friend. She first met Kate in college and while she was remarkable then, she really turned out to be an extraordinary woman.

Coming out to her mother was easy; the great Ambassador Elizabeth Prentiss had showed no real response to the news that her daughter was gay. A couple of weeks after the conversation, her mother emailed her about the daughter of a friend she would like Emily to meet. Two days later she met Kathryn Welsh, daughter of Jonathan Welsh, then Lieutenant General of the US Navy, at a pub outside Georgetown. While Emily was sure she was going to hate Kate- all of her mother's set-ups had previously failed- she couldn't deny how beautiful the woman was. She had long and full dark red hair; clear green eyes. She was a runner and had a runner's body: slender but strong. She sat confidently by the bar chatting with the bartender when Emily approached her.

The women had a lot in common: both daughters of powerful but absent parents, both women lived in a number of different countries and spoke a number of different languages, both women were sophomores at Georgetown, both had recently come out. They dated, shortly, and it was a disaster. While they had very similar upbringing, they had grown into very different women. Kate came from old money and enjoyed a lavish lifestyle, while Emily went out of her way to deny her prestigious family ties. Emily had become and introvert with carefully selected friends, while Kate was an extrovert who made friends with everyone and could talk about anything. Emily was a nerd and Kate was definitely one of the cool kids. Emily wanted a partnership, while Kate hated the idea of commitments. They dated for a couple of months had a horrible break-up but by the end of their sophomore year, they were best friends. Even now, more than ten years later and both in truly demanding jobs, they made a point of talking at least once a month and seeing each other at least once a year. Kate's assignments through DWB, coupled with Emily's assignments through Interpol and FBI allowed the women to travel together to over 20 countries.

"What?" Kate was done with her call and looked frustrated at her friend with a sappy smile.

"Nothing, I just missed you." Emily answered knowing full well how her friend hated mushy talk.

Kate rolled her eyes and gently placed her hand on Emily's leg. "So, how are you feeling my drunky drunk?"

"Sick." Emily responded chuckling at her new nickname. "My head hurts like hell and I am freaked out that I don't remember most of last night." Emily said, slightly ashamed at that realization. "Do you know where DWB is sending you next?" Emily asked in a desperate attempt to try to change the topic.

"Not yet." Kate sounded tired. _I__ wonder __how __much __she __slept __last __night, __if __at __all. __Did __she __come __directly __from__ the __airport __to __the __bar? __Has __she __gotten__ any __sleep __since __she __arrived __from__ the __Congo? _Emily searched her friend for clues.

Feeling her friend's gaze quickly search her face and gestures, Kate snapped, "don't profile me Agent Prentiss or I will stop the car and kick you out. If you have a question, ask it. Like normal people!" She sounded angry but there was a comedic edge to her voice.

"Sorry…" but before Emily had the chance to continue Kate answered the unspoken question, "I am tired. I came directly from the airport and didn't get much sleep," not looking at her friend to confirm her suspicion she continued, "don't feel bad. It is not your fault. I was worried about you and that kept me up but I also have troubles of my own. And no, we are not talking about my problems right now. This weekend is all about you Emmy, you and your straight girl problems." The women laughed and Emily realized she didn't entirely dread talking to Kate about her personal life, or lack thereof.

The weekend at Virginia Beach was exactly what Emily needed. It was the most peaceful Emily had felt in years. They ran on the beach everyday, twice a day. They sat on the beach and talked about their life, their futures and reminisced about their past. They cooked fantastic food together. They had sex- not out of lust but out of comfort. The women knew each other bodies so well that sex was comforting and loving. They didn't lust for each other, they loved each other and sharing each others' bodies was just that, an expression of love. While only friends, the two women often shared a bed in the course of their ten-year relationship. They never cheated on other girlfriends but if single and together, they often indulged in their attraction to one another. Emily felt at home with Kate' body and it helped her to feel wanted and loved. It also helped that the women had fantastic sexual chemistry. Their lovemaking was often fun and they would often fall asleep laughing for one reason or another.

But most importantly, Emily told Kate about JJ. How she loved JJ and how JJ didn't know that. She told Kate about Will and how she pushed JJ to Will hoping that this would quiet her feelings for the blonde. She explained how that didn't work and she started to drink every time she thought about Jennifer, which turned out to be all the time. She told Kate of Will's announcement of their engagement. She told Kate how all the energy she had in her body went into making sure JJ never learned of her feelings for her. She was sure her behavior towards JJ had never changed even as the rest of her life was falling apart. She cried and she screamed. She told this story several times throughout the four-day weekend.

Kate never told her to stop or snap out of it; never once told Emily she was tired of hearing the story. She listened carefully every time Emily told the story and always reassured her that everything was going to be okay.

JJ loved her morning routine when she was in D.C. She always woke up at 5:00am and went to the FBI gym. She would work out for about one hour, shower and head to the office. Arriving around 6:30am meant that she was the first member of her team in the office and she loved the peace and quiet in the BAU early in the morning. She would make the first pot of coffee of the day, the first of many, and head back to her office where she would read files for two whole hours alone in the office. Those were the hours she was the most productive.

At around 8:30am, Hotch would arrive, followed closely by Reid and Rossi. By 8:45am Morgan and Garcia would arrive and shortly before 9am- sometimes shortly after- Emily would come in. She had made a habit of waiting for the brunette to walk into the bullpen. She would watch as she walked out of the elevator with a confident stride. She would always take off her coat and place it on her chair before sitting. During the winter, JJ would look at the brunette while she removed her scarf and shoved it into one of the sleeves in her jacket. The first 10-15 minutes of Emily's day was often spent conversing with Morgan. The two of them were so close that JJ had suspected they were dating. She thought that up until the day Emily came out to the team. Now she saw them more like siblings. They teased each other and were often obnoxiously annoying to each other but it was all due to love- they were family. JJ would always wait about fifteen minutes after Emily had arrived to leave her office seeking more coffee. At this time, she would always pour two cups, one for herself and one for Emily. Emily liked her coffee with a little bit of skim milk- no cream and not sugar. But this Friday something was wrong; something started to trouble her.

She didn't expect Rossi and Reid, they were both out of town in conferences. But at around 9:11am she started to worry about Emily's absence. She reached to call Emily but was called into a meeting with Strauss in order to report on recent cases. looked around and there was no Emily. She could feel herself start to tense up. _Where __is __Emily? __I__ hope__ she__ is __okay._11:17am_.__Okay, __now __I __am __worried._ As JJ walked into the bullpen she turned to Morgan who was intently working on a report, "hey, where's Prentiss?" she asked trying to take the edge out of her voice. "She called in sick," was the only answer she got. As she headed back to her office to give Emily a call just to make sure everything was okay, Hotch called her into a meeting. She finally called her friend around 1:30pm. _Voicemail._ She left a message asking Emily how she was doing. 2:47pm. _No__ response __from __Emily;__maybe __I __should __just__ send __her __a __text __message._3:23pm. Another call, another voicemail. 4:13pm. Another text. _What __the __hell __happened __to __Emily?_

It was 6:02pm when she left Emily's condo building entry. She had stopped by to check on her friend but the doorman explained that Emily was out. She called her friend once again. _Six __phone __calls,__ three __voicemails __and __three __text __messages._She counted._Bad __news __travels __fast, __if __I __haven__'__t __heard__ from__ her, __she __is __fine.__She __has __to __be __fine._ JJ repeated that for most of the 40-minute drive to her apartment.


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry it took me so long. The updates will be more timely from this point on. I think I now know what I want to do with this story. Any and all feedback is appreciated!

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><p>"No, no. Stay, I'll get us coffee…" Emily said as she ran out of the car and into Starbucks.<p>

It was Tuesday morning Kate and Emily were heading to work after a long weekend at Virginia Beach. As Kate watched her friend get out of the car and make a run for the coffee shop, she took a deep breath and thought about her life. She couldn't believe she was back in D.C. She couldn't believe that Emily was in love. She couldn't believe that she was about to face Jane again. She had left D.C. for Africa seven years ago and had vowed never to return. Emily was always so controlled and closed off that Kate always wondered if she would ever allow herself to fall deeply in love with someone else; and Jane, well, that situation was more complicated than Kate cared for. Actually, it was too complicated. Kate laughed to herself as Emily made a run back to the car. It was violently raining and the short run to and from the coffee shop was enough to get Emily pretty wet. Kate opened the door from the inside to help her friend, now carrying two large cups of coffee, back into the car.

"Thanks," Kate said as she reached for her cup. "I could have gone with you."

"Oh, don't worry," said Emily taking the first sip of her coffee and turning the car back on, "I have a system."

Kate gave a flirtatious and inquisitive look and a laughing Emily responded, "I flirt with the barista so she gives us extra espresso shots. I didn't want you to cramp my style." The two women laughed as Emily drove them out of the parking lot and onto the highway.

"So tell me, was your coffee girlfriend jealous that you bought two cups of coffee today?" Kate asked but before Emily had a chance to answer, Kate continued, "Jennifer. You often get her a cup of coffee, don't you? Your coffee girlfriend wasn't jealous because you often buy two cups of coffee. You are a teddy bear, do you know that, Emily? An incredibly sexy teddy bear." And with that, both women laughed again.

As Emily navigated to the right in order to take the exit to Memorial Hospital she glanced at her best friend. _She __is __biting __her __lower __lip. __She __is __playing __with __her __graduation __ring. __She __is __anxious._ "Are you okay?" Emily asked with concern. "Yeah, I'm fine." Kate answered, unconvincingly.

"Kate, talk to me. Let me in." Emily pleaded. She had known for days that there was something bothering her friend but Kate had adamantly refused to discuss the issue. From conversational cues, Emily knew that it had something to do with Kate's ex, Jane. Kate and Jane had dated for eight months, which is very long in Kate's world. But Kate had called less than a month ago with the news that she and Jane had broken up. Emily remembered the conversation and also remembered how dismissive she was of Kate's feelings. The brunette had been so depressed about JJ that she had ignored a friend, her best friend, in a time of need. She felt guilty and angry with herself for allowing her wallowing about JJ to have taken control of all of her life. "Come on, Kate, talk to me or I won't let it go."

"Jane is in D.C. She is also working at Memorial. I haven't seen her since we broke up and I am not sure how to deal with it." Kate said, rushing through her words as she saw the massive hospital now only a few blocks away. "What happened between you two?" Emily asked knowing that this was not one of the traditional Kate relationships. Kate had the tendency to fall quickly and deeply in love but just as quickly, she would fall out of love leaving a trail of broken hearted women behind. Kate relationships were short and intense. But Jane was different, Emily knew that much.

There was a heavy silence in the car. Neither spoke while Emily parked the car at Memorial Hospital's emergency parking lot.

"She proposed. I said no. I asked to be excused from my rotation and left for D.C. She left after me. She says she won't take no for an answer. She says she knows that I love her. She is convinced I am just scared." Kate responded in her Dr. Welsh voice. Emily knew that voice because it was her SSA Prentiss voice. Both women were raised in high achieving families where you are taught to compartmentalize every aspect of your life. Kate did love Jane and she was suffering so she did what all Prentisses and Welshes did, she shoved her feelings into a little tiny box and hoped they would smother to death.

The two women looked at each other's eyes and Emily whispered, "I love you, Kate" as Kate stepped out of the car and made a run for the hospital.

Emily finally arrived at headquarters and took sometime in her car to build up her walls. For the first time in over six weeks she was feeling in control again. Her feelings for JJ were still very much alive but she at least felt she was able to control them enough to work. She sat in her car and repeated Kate's advice over and over again in her head. _Take __care __of __yourself. __Take __your __time. __Keep __your __shit __together._ It was now her turn to shove her feelings for JJ into a tiny little box and hope they would smother to death.

Emily walked into the bullpen with a confidence she did not feel. She smiled as she saw Morgan who immediately got up from his chair and gave the brunette a warm hug. Over Morgan's shoulder she saw Reid who smiled at her and nodded lovingly. Feeling herself surrounded by her team, her family, she realized that as much as she needed and cherished her time off, she was happy to be back.

Emily was too involved in the conversation with Reid and Morgan, and too focused at not looking towards JJ's office, to realize that the blonde was right there, by her window, staring intently at the brunette.

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><p><em>9:07am<em>, JJ had looked up at her clock when she say that Emily had walked in, _no __not __walked, __swaggered_ into the bullpen. There was something about Emily that made JJ get up from her chair to get a better look at the brunette. JJ had noticed, well everyone had noticed, that Emily wasn't doing well. She seemed distressed during the past several weeks. But today, today she was like the old Emily. She walked in, _no, __not __walked, sexily __swaggered_ into the bullpen like she used to do and JJ couldn't help but smile. She had missed her best friend and she wasn't sure where she had gone. But today, today she was back.

JJ walked briskly towards the door to welcome Emily back, forgetting all the hurt and bitterness she had felt this weekend when the brunette refused to answer her phone calls and text messages but she stopped on her tracks. She stopped as the flood of emotions she had felt this weekend, from fear of losing her friend to resentment of being ignored, came rushing back. She was mad at Emily and she felt rejected. She also knew that while she objectively had the right to be mad, Emily did in fact ignore her calls and texts and brunette knew JJ was prone to worry about her, her bitterness ran deeper. She had spent most of the weekend trying to figure out why this was bothering her so much. Actually, she had spent so much time thinking about Emily that she knew she had hurt Will's feelings. He had flown in from New Orleans for the weekend and they were supposed to be planning for the wedding but every conversation they had, JJ would bring it back to Emily and why she was being ignored. She had obsessed about it all weekend and it only got worse when she learned that Emily had called work, specifically Morgan, to let him know that she would be back in on Tuesday morning but that, if they got a case, she could be reached at a particular number. A number that JJ had Garcia search. A number from Virginia Beach.

JJ stood by her window and decided that she would wait for Emily to come talk to her. _She __always __does._


	4. Chapter 4

The day was pretty uneventful. Emily worked on files she needed to complete and she allowed herself to be fully immersed in her work. She went through files quickly, effectively completing them. She felt good and in control though she was fully aware she was not ready to talk to JJ.

JJ had stopped by and attempted to small talk but Emily had been dismissive and almost rude. She felt bad knowing that she was hurting her friend but she needed to learn how to compartmentalize her feelings for JJ and until then, she needed to _Take __her __time __and __Keep __her __shit __together._

The day went by fast and at 5:30pm, Hotch had called her and Reid into a meeting.

Emily walked into the room and immediately spotted JJ. _Keep __your __shit __together._ She made her way to the chair closest to the window both because she liked the view out of Hotch's office and because it was the only chair that did not face the spot where JJ was standing directly. She took a moment to look at he blonde though and was, as always, blown away by her beauty. Emily then stared intently out of the window and missed as JJ slowly looked her up and down, licked her lips and took a deep breath.

Reid had barely sat when Hotch stated explaining that, "the Colorado Office of the FBI has requested our help with a possible case. There has been a 911 call out of a religious compound called Liberty Ranch, in La Plata, Colorado, alleging that the religious leader is engaging in polygamy, pedophilia and forced marriages. The church's leader, Benjamin Cyrus, is a charismatic religious leader and the Colorado office has gotten him to agree to allow the children to be interviewed. Local police and the local FBI office have requested BAU assistance."

The unit chief explained. He handed them a number files and continued, "this is not officially a FBI case so you guys are going as Colorado Child Services agents. Take a look at the files, let JJ and I know if you guys have any questions. You flight leaves tomorrow at 5am from Dulles Airport."

Reid got up and left the office and as Emily was leaving the office, she heard Hotch say, "welcome back Prentiss, you look like you feel a lot better." Emily smiled at her boss and walked out. Hotch and Emily had a weird beginning; she didn't like him and she was suspicious of her but since the Milwaukee case they had gotten closer. Emily now knew that Hotch respected her as a profiler and she respected and appreciated him as a unit chief. Also, they common hatred towards Strauss had provided them with a good bonding experience.

However, before Emily got to the bullpen she felt a light touch on her shoulder. She didn't need to look back, she knew whom that touch belonged to but before she could turn around she heard, "Prentiss, could you please meet me in my office?"

Emily followed JJ to her office. _Keep __your __shit __together.__Take __your __time._ Emily repeated the chants in her head and chastised herself for staring at the blonde's ass as they walked to the office.

Emily closed the door behind her and turned towards JJ. JJ didn't go all the way around her desk; she just leaned against it, facing Emily who stopped precariously close to the door. Emily couldn't help but take a moment to just look at the blonde. She was beautiful: long blonde hair, pink lips, light blue eyes, she was wearing a pink v-neck and a gray skirt. She looked beautiful. _Keep __your __shit __together_. Emily looked up and meeting JJ's eyes asked, as little harsher than she intended, "What's the matter JJ? Everything okay?"

There was an awkward silence in the office and Emily actually heard JJ take a deep breath. She also saw the blonde's bright blue eyes turn a dark shade of blue. Emily leaned against the door as she felt all the air being drained out of the office. She wasn't sure how or why but the intensity in the room made it clear that she should prepare herself for a fight.

"I don't know Agent Prentiss, you tell me. Is everything okay?" JJ hadn't meant this to be a confrontation but Emily's tone pushed her over the edge. She knew she was being purposefully ignored. She had called, texted and even stopped by Emily's apartment and the brunette couldn't be bothered to respond. Worse, even today, her first day back in the office, Emily kept ignoring her. JJ had tried to make casual conversation when she went to get more coffee. She even brought Emily coffee and noticed the Starbucks cup on Emily's desk. She instinctively knew that Emily had stopped at the Starbucks they normally go to but had neglected to bring something back for JJ. She always brought something back for JJ. JJ knew it was irrational for being mad at Emily for not doing something that Emily was in no way required to do but she was still mad.

For what felt like minutes but was actually only a few seconds, no one said anything. JJ and Emily had never fought. They were good friends and colleagues and always had a friendly and peaceful relationship. This, whatever this was, was new.

Realizing that her walls were quickly crumbling and that she was now unable to keep her shit together, Emily did what she does best and avoided the situation. "JJ, I am sorry I didn't call. I was busy. If there is nothing else, I need to go back to my desk and read about Benjamin Cyrus and his ranch. My flight leaves in about 12 hours." And before JJ could say anything, Emily left the office and closed the door behind her.

With her new assignment at hand, Emily ran out of the office. Garcia and Morgan had invited her out for drinks but she needed to go home. She couldn't handle being around JJ, particularly when the woman was mad. Actually, particularly when she didn't know why the woman was so mad. She hadn't answered JJ's calls but that doesn't explain the hostility in the blonde's voice. _I __don__'__t __know __Agent __Prentiss, __you __tell __me. __Is __everything __okay?_ That was hostile. That was mean. JJ never called her Agent Prentiss, unless she was joking. Driving home, she kept going through the interaction with JJ, there was something off but she couldn't figure out what happened. Emily felt both defensive and guilty and hated both feelings.

"Hey Kate," with a quick voice command, Emily called Kate from her car. "Hope your day was better than mine."

"Not likely; two surgeries and, its official, Jane hates me." Emily could tell by Kate's voice that she was exhausted. "How was JJ?"

"Don't ask." Emily responded and Kate knew not to push.

"What are you doing for dinner?" The redhead asked.

"Whatever you are. I am heading home now, when do I get to see you?" Emily asked as she took the exit towards her apartment.

"I'll be there in 40 minutes. I'll stop La Trattoria and get us some Italian food. How about the pumpkin ravioli that you love?" Kate asked as she changed out of her scrubs and into her street clothes.

"Perfect. I will open a bottle of wine."

"Perfect." Kate answered storming out of the hospital hoping to avoid Jane on her way out.

* * *

><p>JJ just stood there; staring at the door through which Emily left. She felt like crying but she didn't know why. She felt like screaming but she didn't know why. She couldn't understand what happened between her and Emily and she definitely couldn't understand what she was feeling.<p>

Everything used to be so simple. Emily was her best friend and Will was her boyfriend. Now Emily won't speak to her and JJ is constantly annoyed at Will. He has called her all day and she has ignored him; ignored him the same way that Emily had ignored her. _The __irony_, she thought as she once again pressed "Ignore" when her phone started vibrating with the sixth phone call from Will. She just didn't understand anything anymore.

At 7:02pm JJ gave up trying to be productive and left the BAU. She was the last one there and as she walked through the bullpen she stopped by Emily's desk. The desk was clear and most of Emily's files were in the outgoing box. JJ wondered how is it that she was barely able to focus on anything but Emily went through almost three days of backed up files in one day. She sat in Emily's desk and realized that it smelled like her. Emily often wore a vanilla, lavender body wash and the chair had taken some of her scent. _Why __do __I __know __what __she __smells __like?_

JJ knew Emily owed her a real apology, not whatever happened today but she also owed Emily an apology. She had overreacted and whatever was behind her overreaction was not Emily's fault. She didn't understand what she was feeling but she knew that that was her problem, not Emily's. She had to put an end to this mess. She couldn't lose Emily. With confidence she didn't entirely posses, she left headquarters towards D.C.

* * *

><p>Emily was drinking her first glass of wine when the doorbell rang. "I'm coming Kate," she answered as she walked towards the door. It wasn't until she was opening the door that she remembered that Kate has her own key. "JJ, what are you doing here?" Was all she got out before the blonde marched into the home.<p>

JJ wanted to ask who was Kate. She wanted to know why Emily was waiting for a Kate. Was Kate the reason Emily hadn't called her back? Was Kate with Emily at Virginia Beach? But knowing that asking Emily about her personal life would only lead to more awkward silences and incomplete answers, she decided to let it go and do what she had planned to do.

"I am sorry Emily. I am really sorry. I don't know why I snapped at you. I was worried about you this weekend and then I felt ignored but that doesn't justify how I have treated you." Realizing she was babbling, JJ concluded, "again, I am sorry."

Silence. Emily felt bad she had made JJ feel bad but she was still aware that she wasn't ready to interact with JJ and was fully aware that they were now alone, in her apartment and her heart started to beat a bit faster.

"I am sorry, JJ. I should have let you know I was okay. I didn't mean to hurt you. And please, there is no need to apologize. " Emily said, pausing between her words in order to better control the tone in her voice. She had a need to make JJ feel better but she was also hurt. It wasn't JJ's fault but Emily was hurt that JJ didn't love her back.

Silence.

And as the two women stared at each other, Emily broke into laughter at the sheer awkwardness of the situation. JJ joined because, what the hell, right? JJ walked towards her best friend and gave Emily a hug. The past couple of days had been weird and hard for both women and the hug was welcomed. Holding each other in their arms, JJ looked up at the brunette and asked with a significantly lighter tone and a flirtatious look, "So, how was Virginia Beach?"

Enjoying the more friendly tone of the conversation, as well as JJ's body so close to hers, Emily started to answer but was interrupted by the sound of her deadbolt being unlocked. She froze in JJ's arms as Kate walked through the door yelling, "Emmy, they didn't have the pumpkin ravioli, so I got us the cheese ravioli with steak. Is that okay?"

Kate walked into the kitchen to find the two women hugging. While she had never met the blonde, she knew that was Agent Jennifer Jareau and she immediately knew why her friend was so obsessed with the blonde. Jareau was a beautiful woman but most importantly, she was a perfect prototype of Emily Prentiss' type.

"Oh, I am so sorry to interrupt," Kate said as she gave Emily a "_are __you __okay?__"_ look. Seeing that Emily was at a loss for words and that JJ was giving her a glare of death, Kate excused herself by saying, "I'll be upstairs if you guys need anything." Kate walked into the kitchen, took grabbed silverware, as well as the opened bottle of wine, and headed upstairs. Right before going up the stairs, she gave Emily an encouraging look and left the room giving the agents some privacy.

JJ felt every cell in her body burst with anger. _Emmy? __Who __the __hell __was __this __woman __calling __Emily, __Emmy?_ She walked away from the hug and looked at Emily who was clearly avoiding her gaze. "Who is that, Emily?" JJ asked, knowing full well that it was none of her business.

"Kate." Emily answered knowing full well that she wasn't really answering the question but unwilling to provide any more information.

"And who is that, Emily?" Asked JJ fully aware of what Emily was doing.

"A Friend." Was all Emily was willing to give.

"Old friend, new friend? From where? High School? College?" JJ asked, with an edge in her voice irritated at Emily's avoidance techniques. JJ knew she was out of line. She knew that she had no right to be annoyed that Emily had a woman over but she just couldn't help herself.

"So, how was Will's visit?" Emily asked, knowing her change of topic would irritate JJ. Knowing that her change of topic to Will would really irritate JJ. And seeking to remind JJ that she had a partner and that partner was not Emily.

JJ fell silent. She knew that whoever Kate was, was none of her business but she needed to know. She didn't understand why she felt so possessive of Emily but she did. She was also mad at Emily for bringing Will up because he had nothing to do with this conversation, right? _Did__he?_JJ turned away from Emily and placed both her hands on the breakfast bar. She felt emotionally exhausted and she didn't understand why. She wished she could talk to someone about this but the person she always went to was Emily. However, in this case, Emily was the reason she was so confused.

Emily couldn't take it anymore. She could feel her heart breaking again and she was irritated at JJ. It was none of JJ's business who Kate was. It was none of JJ's business where she was in the past weekend. JJ was in a relationship, a relationship with Will- not Emily. Emily could feel tears building up in her eyes and she would be damned if she would allow JJ to see her cry.

"JJ, why are you here?" Emily asked, emotionally exhausted.

"I don't know." JJ answered, emotionally exhausted.

"Then," Emily walking towards and opening the front door, "you should go figure it out."

The awkwardness was palpable and the silence pierced both women's hearts. They knew right then that something was broken but they weren't sure what. JJ couldn't understand why she was so upset about Kate. Emily couldn't understand why JJ was so upset about this whole situation.

JJ quietly leaves and a defeated Emily walks upstairs and into her room. Kate is sitting on her bed, eating cheese ravioli and drinking wine directly from the bottle. Making space in the bed for a sobbing Emily, Kate says, "now that was awkward."


	5. Chapter 5

The women ate in silence. As soon as the first bottle of wine was drunk, Kate got up and went to the kitchen to get another. Two and a half bottles of wine later, Kate, breaking the silence says, "You know Emmy, I think you got this wrong…" Emily shifts from her position at the foot of the bed and asks, "wrong how?"

"I don't think you are in love with a straight woman who is in a relationship… I think you are in love with a woman who is in a relationship…" Kate said without actually looking up at her friend.

Emily laughed in spite of herself, "Kate, you think everyone is gay."

"Not true, and I never said I thought she was gay. She just isn't exactly straight." Kate said, happy that the atmosphere in the room had lightened. She felt bad she had interrupted the agents but Emily's demeanor showed that the brunette didn't blame her for the fight with JJ.

"Even if she isn't straight, what does it matter? She is still engaged." Emily answered in her SSA Prentiss voice and Kate knew then that Emily had suspected JJ wasn't straight but that she had compartmentalized the information because it was easier to be rejected by a straight girl.

"She didn't reject you, you know." Kate said, responding to her own thought process.

"Well, doesn't really matter anymore, does it? She's engaged." Emily said again in her Agent Prentiss voice and it became clear that Kate wasn't getting through to her. Emily lied down next to her friend and closed her eyes. Kate lied down next to Emily hugging her and soon both women fell a sleep.

Garcia woke up to knocks on her door. She pulled on a bathrobe and slowly walked to the front door. The knocks were frantic like someone was being chased and when she looked through the peephole there was a crying JJ.

"JJ! Oh my God! Is everything okay?" Garcia said leading her friend to the couch in the living room.

* * *

><p>Garcia held JJ as she cried. At first the agent tried to explain to the technical analyst what was happening but all Garcia could make out through the sobbing was "Emily," "Will" and "Kate." And while Garcia had no idea who Kate was, she had long expected JJ to have a breakdown because of the "Will," "Emily" situation. Garcia, after all, knows all.<p>

Garcia had noticed the two women. She had noticed the stolen glances and the unnecessary touching. She had noticed how both Emily and JJ went out of their way to be kind to one another. Emily always brought JJ a latte in the morning and JJ always brought Emily a coffee refill in the afternoon. They shared food, candy and oftentimes would make sure the other drank enough water or had enough food during cases. She had noticed how during particularly hard times Emily and JJ were always together- like they sought each other when a case got particularly dark. Garcia had noticed Emily's downward spiral after Will's announced his and JJ's engagement and noticed the fear and desperation in JJ's voice when she asked Garcia to track Emily down this past weekend. Garcia knew that there was something more between the women, something other than friendship, but she was also aware that neither woman knew that.

* * *

><p>"Oh come on Emily! How can you possibly say you love someone when you have never kissed them, touched them, never fucked them…" Kate asked as she drove the car towards Dulles Airport. It was 3:30 in the morning and the women had been talking about love and relationships for the past hour.<p>

"I don't know. Sometimes you just know. I just know I love JJ. I know she is the one for me. I need no confirmation." Emily answered. She knew how Kate felt about love and commitment and she knew that Kate's question ran deeper that it appeared. Kate was in love with Jane but was terrified of her feelings. Kate was terrified that, for the first time in her life, she needed someone.

"You need to tell her;" Kate said, "she has a right to know that you love her."

"Why? What good can that possibly bring? She is engaged, Kate. Engaged! Like you would be if you weren't so scared of being happy." Emily said, calmly observing Kate to make sure she hadn't just crossed a line.

"Ouch! Was that really necessary?" Said Kate, as she not so gently punched her friend's shoulder. "And we are talking about your fucked up love life, not mine."

"It's fucked up alright…" Emily responded rubbing her shoulder and smiling at her friend.

"You need to tell her Emmy, she deserves to know. And you deserve to know how she feels." Kate said with true emotion in her voice. Emily just looked at her friend, speechless. Kate was never emotional, especially not when the conversation was about love.

"What if she says no?" Emily asked.

"Then you move on. I think that the reason why you haven't moved on yet, is because you convinced yourself she was straight and that there was no chance. But deep down inside you knew there was a chance. A chance you never took. JJ cares for you, a lot. And part of you still wonders if it could be more than friendship. And for as long as you wonder, you are stuck. You need an answer- you need closure." Kate explained as she pulled into the quick drop-off area at Dulles.

"Fine," said Emily as she got off the car, it was hard to argue with Kate, particularly when she knew the redhead was right, "I will tell JJ how I feel if you tell Jane that you love her." Emily challenged. Kate smiled at her friend and nodded "no" but as Emily walked away she simply said. "Good, looks like we have a deal."

As Emily made her way into the airport, Kate yelled, "let me know when you land and when you are on your way back. I can come get you. And, Emmy, there is no deal. No, Emily Prentiss, do not ignore me. THERE IS NO DEAL! "

* * *

><p>JJ sat at Garcia's kitchen table holding a cup of a tea. She had just told Garcia about her disastrous weekend with Will and her disastrous conversation with Emily. She had told Garcia about the woman in Emily's apartment and how close she could tell they were. And at the end of her explanation Garcia asked JJ the question she had been avoiding for the past four days.<p>

"So, Jay, what do you want? Do you want Emily? Or is she just a good friend you are scared of losing? Were you jealous of this Kate lady? Do you still love Will?" And after staring at her tea, JJ nodded without an answer and cried harder.


	6. Chapter 6

It was almost 9am when the two friends walked into the BAU office. JJ felt like hell but she was professional and composed while dealing with local FBI offices and sheriffs departments. She knew that regardless of the personal turmoil she was currently going through, she had an important job to fulfill. Garcia had made a point of stopping by her office every hour to check on her and JJ was happy for the constant distraction.

She spent most of her free time telling herself not to think about Emily, which meant that she spent all her free time thinking about Emily. Will had called and left desperate messages and other than a text message letting him know that she was, in fact, still alive, JJ had been unresponsive. It had not gone unnoticed to JJ that every time the phone rang she had wished it was Emily and that she was filled with disappointment when she realized that it was _only_ Will.

It was about 1pm when Garcia walked in with a bowl of salad and a cup of iced tea. The technical analyst sat on the small leather couch in JJ's office and motioned her friend to join her; before the agent had a chance to reject the salad Garcia firmly stated, "I am not asking, you need to eat." Unable to argue with her friend, JJ sat at the couch and started on the food.

"Have you called Emily?" Garcia asked knowing that this was going to be a hard and long conversation but she needed to start it somewhere.

"Not really," answered JJ, "I called and left a message with some new information we had gathered on Cyrus but nothing personal."

"Do you love her, JJ?" Garcia asked. While Garcia was fairly sure she knew the answer to that question, she was unsure if JJ did. The agent was silent, so Garcia pressured on, "she loves you, you know? She has for a while." JJ didn't respond and after what felt like an interminably long time, JJ started to cry.

Garcia wrapped her arms around her friend and said, "talk to me sweetie, what are you thinking? Let me into this head of yours…" And trying to regain her composure, JJ answered, "I think I messed things up Garcia. I lost her. She is someone else's now…"

"So you love her," Garcia tentatively stated.

"I have Will. And he is a good man Garcia, he doesn't deserve this." JJ said, waving her hand around and not really answering Garcia's question and that did not go unnoticed.

"Do you love Will?" Garcia asked; she was determined to get the agent to talk about her feelings.

"Sure." JJ answered as she started to cry but for the first time in the past four days she cried not because she was confused but because she finally figured it out. "No, not anymore." She corrected.

"Do you love Emily?" Garcia asked.

"I don't know," JJ answered honestly. "I care for her, deeply. But I am not sure what to make of it. I always assumed it was friendship but every time I think about Emily I realize that I have noticed things about her that I don't of other friends. Like," JJ said turning to look directly at the technical analyst, " I know you like your coffee black- but that's it. I know Emily likes her coffee with only a bit of milk, no sugar. But I also know that she drinks coffee in the morning and then in the early afternoon. However, later in the day she transitions to espresso drinks and always put a pack of sugar in the raw in them. She never fills the mug but she drinks several half mugs throughout the day. She does that because she hates lukewarm coffee. She holds her coffee cups with both hands because it keeps her fingers warm." JJ finishes with an almost imperceptible smile on her face; just the thought of Emily making her smile.

JJ, after allowing herself a moment to enjoy her memory of Emily, turns to Garcia and asks, "who is she?"

Even though the team had promised never to profile each other or run searches on each other, JJ knew that Garcia had searched for Kate. "You have to ask her," Garcia answered, she didn't want to betray Emily's trust.

"Please Garcia, I need to know…" JJ pleaded.

"It looks like they met in college. They graduate from Georgetown the same year…""What else," JJ interrupted, she wanted everything she could get on the woman in Emily's apartment.

"She is a doctor. Has an American and a French license but works almost exclusively in Africa." "What is she doing in the US?" Again, JJ interrupted her friend's explanation. She needed information; she needed something that would explain why Kate was in Emily's apartment.

"I don't know." Garcia answered, and in a careless moment, mostly due to getting carried away in the search- Garcia loved to learn new information about people- she continued, "it is actually really weird that she is in the US, they normally meet in Europe…"

"They, as in she and Emily? How many times have they met? For how long have they met? Garcia, who is this woman!" Sighing and realizing that she had already provided too much information but that it was too late to try to stop now, she continued, "all I know is that when I was searching for Kate's information I found several airline tickets. They were mostly around Africa and Europe but I realized that from time to time, her travels and Emily's would overlap."

"What does that mean, Garcia?" JJ asked even though she already knew the answer. This wasn't a new friend; this was an old friend, a very close friend of Emily's.

"From time to time, Kate's ticket put her sitting next to an Emily Prentiss. There are several tickets, mostly trips around Western and Eastern Europe, but also some around Africa and the Middle East, going back 13 years." Garcia answered feeling shitty for having betrayed Emily and feeling shitty for having told JJ that the woman she was in love with has had a long-term relationship with another woman.

Garcia herself wasn't sure what to do with that information. Emily was mysterious but hiding a ten year-old romantic relationship was extreme, even for the brunette. Someone in the office would have known, they were friends; Emily would have introduced her to the team. _Right?_ At least she would have introduced her to Morgan. But Garcia couldn't remember Emily talking about any other dates in the past three years she had known the brunette. Emily never really dated. But it also didn't make any sense to keep a relationship going for thirteen years with Emily in the US and Kate in Africa. Garcia knew that Emily had been with Interpol, if she had a relationship with someone in Africa it wouldn't make any sense to transfer to the FBI; with Interpol Emily could essentially choose where to live and then she could live in Africa with Kate.

JJ sat in silence. She felt defeated. Part of her anxiety about Emily was the fact that she felt inadequate. Emily was Interpol, CIA; she had graduated _summa cum laude_ from Georgetown and had one of the best records in the FBI. She spoke several languages, lived in several countries and knew so much about the world. She was wealthy and well connected. _She is completely out of my league._ Kate was a Georgetown graduate, was a doctor; having lived in Africa for so long, she probably spoke different languages; she could travel around Europe with Emily, so clearly she had money. _Emily and Kate made sense. Maybe I am better off with Will. _JJ thought, broken hearted and defeated.

Running her fingers through her hair, JJ, with tears in her eyes, asks, "Pen, did I miss my chance? Oh God Pen, did I _ever_ have a chance?"

But before Garcia had a chance to respond, JJ's computer started to beep; the buzzing of her Blackberry quickly followed and JJ quickly moved behind her computer and within seconds, she made it across to the bullpen, calling out for Morgan.

"You need to see this." Fear and rage permeated every one of JJ's words.

"This isn't the ranch where Reid and Prentiss are conducting interviews is it?" Morgan asked even through he already knew the answer.

"They are still in there." JJ answered in an utterly defeated voice. _Oh my God, Emily! _


	7. Chapter 7

Still trying to figure out how to conclude this story- so all ideas are welcomed! Thanks for the reviews, they make my day.

* * *

><p>JJ sat quietly in the plane staring intently at a sleeping Emily.<p>

She had been observing Emily since they had left Colorado. She had seen Emily joke around with Morgan to try to make him feel better about having to listen to her be beaten by Cyrus. She had observed her as she made Reid feel better about the fact that Emily identified herself as the only FBI agent. She then listened to Emily call Kate and let her know she was on her way home. She saw it all: the joking and playful side of Emily, the thoughtful and caring side of Emily and the loving and loyal side of Emily.

And it was clearer than it has ever been that JJ wanted it all; she wanted all of Emily.

She knew now that she was jealous of Kate. She was jealous of the obvious intimacy between the two women. Jealous that Kate was the first- and only- person Emily called to let know about what happened in Colorado. Jealous of the fact that tonight, Kate, not her, would take care of a beaten and bruised Emily.

She was also aware that her night was bound to be a disaster. She had texted Will with the infamous, "we need to talk" text and knew that, regardless of what happened between her and Emily- though she hoped something would happen between her and Emily- she couldn't be with him anymore.

* * *

><p>"I am driving you home. Wait here. I'll go get the car." JJ stated once the team got back to headquarters. It wasn't an order, it wasn't a request; it was a fact. JJ was driving Emily home. Too tired to fight and understanding the blonde agent's tone, Emily sat on the bench inside the FBI headquarters parking lot and once again responded to a text from Kate.<p>

Emily had called Kate and explained what had happened- not because she found it necessary to tell the doctor but mostly because she wouldn't be able to hide the bruising. It was easier to tell her beforehand and prepare her for the sight then to deal with a surprised Kate.

However, the doctor had panicked and overreacted and Emily had quickly regretted informing her friend of the injuries. Kate was demanding that Emily stop by the hospital and that was just not going to happen; Emily hated hospitals. She was drafting her third, "not a chance" text when JJ pulled her car onto the driveway.

The drive was quiet with JJ, from time to time, asking Emily if she was feeling okay. When they finally arrived at Emily's condo, Emily quickly opened the door and briskly grabbed her bag. But before she could make a run for it, she felt a radiating pain from her ribs and fell to the ground. JJ rushed to Emily's side and helped the brunette up.

Making direct eye contact, JJ stated, "I know things are weird Emily but you will need help getting upstairs. Let me help me you."

Locking the car door, JJ held Emily's arm as they walked towards the building, into the elevator and down the hall to Emily's door. Emily unlocked the door and the two women walked in together, still holding hands. Emily quietly said "thank you" and turned to face JJ. As tears started to stream down her face Emily walked towards her couch and closed her eyes.

JJ's eyes were all she could think about when she was in that compound. It was the memory of JJ that kept her fighting. She knew she could withstand Cyrus' blows because she believed, no, she knew, she was going to see JJ again. She had promised herself that if she left that compound alive she would tell JJ, tell her everything and live with the consequences of her actions. But now, alone in her apartment with JJ, all Emily could do was cry for the opportunity she believed she had already lost. Now that she was back, alive, the strength she had found in the compound was failing her.

Emily ran her hand through her hair and attempted to wipe her tears as she heard the blonde moving into her kitchen and grabbing two glasses of water. Feeling JJ sit on the coffee table across from her and a cold glass of water tapping her hand, Emily opened her eyes only to realize just how close she and JJ were sitting. The women were less than a foot apart, directly facing each other.

JJ closed her eyes, took a deep breath and confidently said, "Emily, we need to talk. I am not sure how to say this…" But before JJ had a chance to continue, Kate walked into the apartment and stopped when she realized that she had again, interrupted an intimate moment.

"Oh for Christ sake! You two need to put a sock on the door." Kate exclaimed, walking into the living room and turning Emily towards her. Not waiting for either agent to respond, Kate continued, "fuck Emmy, what the fuck happened to your fucking face?"

Turning to JJ, Kate asked, "did she go to a hospital?" "No." JJ answered feeling like a child being scolded.

"Okay, go upstairs," Kate says to Emily, "I want to check and clean your bruises."

Emily's first reaction was to try to fight her friend but she also needed to get away from the JJ. She felt weak and vulnerable and she knew, for a fact, she couldn't afford to be weak and vulnerable around JJ.

As Emily stood up to walk upstairs she saw JJ walk towards the door and gather her belongings, however, before the blonde actually exited the apartment, Kate said, "Agent Jareau, could you stay a little longer? I might need your help."

"Sure." JJ answered knowing that Kate's question was really a statement.

Once Kate and Emily got to the room, Kate quickly proceeded to give Emily a physical, focusing on her vision and her ribs. During the first couple of minutes it became pretty clear to Kate that Emily only had some external injuries and bruising. She took a bad beating but she would be fine.

"She thinks we are dating," was the first thing that Kate said to Emily as she concluded the examination.

"So?" Emily answered trying to pretend she didn't care about what Kate was implying.

"She's jealous." Kate explained. "She likes you."

Realizing that Emily was not about to respond that her statement, Kate continued, "you should come with me to the hospital, you are technically fine, Emmy, but you took a brutal beating. I would be more comfortable if you weren't alone tonight."

"I am fine Kate, besides, why can't you stay?" Emily asked, she really didn't want to go to the hospital.

"I have a heart transplant on a nine-year old schedule in three hours. I can't re-schedule it." Kate said, "She should stay over…" Kate started to say but was interrupted by a forceful "no fucking way" from the brunette.

Kate looked at her watch and realized that she had about an hour to make it back to Memorial Hospital. "I have to go, Emmy. And you shouldn't be alone. Do you have a better idea?" And as Emily searched for a better idea, Kate continued, this time smiling, " I can always call you mother…"

Not quite able to stop herself from laughing, Emily stated, "I can't have her here, Kate. I can't be alone with her. I haven't been able to stop myself from loving her yet…"

"Then don't." Kate interrupted. "Then just love her. She certainly loves you."

"She is engaged." Emily answered, "not married." Kate completed.

"I am not going to ask her to stay," Kate said as she got up from the bed and walked towards the door, "but you should."

Emily stood up to meet her friend at her bedroom's door when Kate's phone rang. Quickly, Jane picked up the phone and asked whoever was on the other side of the line to "tell Dr. Moore she would be back within the hour." And having resigned herself to the fact that she would no longer be able to avoid JJ, Emily quickly realized and asked, "wait, your transplant is with Jane?"

"Yep. So think about it this way, at least when you attempt to deal with your fucked up love life you won't have you hand inside a child's chest." Kate said as she smiled, walked downstairs and left the apartment, leaving JJ and Emily alone in the living room.

* * *

><p>Kate got back to the hospital and, with two cups of coffee, walked into the doctors' lounge and taking a seat next to her ex, handed her the coffee and thanked her to covering for her.<p>

"How is Prentiss doing?" Jane asked with a tone that Kate knew was masking jealousy.

"Well, she is fine; she was beaten pretty badly but only has superficial bruising. One of her colleagues is staying overnight." Kate answered, sipping her coffee. Realizing that Jane didn't understand the need for the chaperone, Kate explained "She needs to talk to this particular colleague, they have issues they need to work on."

And finally understanding what Kate was saying, Jane exclaimed, "it's truly incredible that you are able to so elegantly deal with Emily's love life but are unable to make yours work." It had been almost a week and Jane was tired of waiting for Kate to start the conversation they both knew they needed to have.

"Wow, that was harsh…" Kate joked, trying, unsuccessfully to keep the conversation light.

"Is that your way of telling me that you are ready to talk?" Jane asked ignoring the joke but not making eye contact with her ex.

"Is this your way of telling me that I don't have a choice?" Kate asked even though she knew the answer. "Okay, then, lets more somewhere private. People talk here. A lot."


	8. Chapter 8

Emily took a deep breath as she heard Kate locking the door from the outside. This was it: she was alone in her apartment with JJ. It used to be simple; they had done this before. When Emily was first transferred to the BAU, she and JJ spent most of their time together. For most of the first year, they were inseparable friends. For the other two, they were still inseparable but were something more than friends but less than lovers. JJ has spent many nights in Emily's apartment, as Emily had spent many nights at JJ's house but today was different.

They had tiptoed around their feelings for almost two years, and ignored them altogether since Will and the proposal. But it was now obvious that they couldn't hide anymore. Emily needed to tell JJ how she felt and live with the consequences. Slowly and purposefully breathing out, Emily walked downstairs to face JJ.

To Emily's surprise, JJ was walking around, looking through her kitchen cabinets. "What are you up to Jay?" Emily asks, walking behind her friend unable to keep from smiling at the frazzled blonde. "I was going to start making us something, I figured we should eat." JJ answers, moving to the other side of the breakfast bar and taking a seat at a stool.

Now, openly laughing, Emily says, "But JJ, you can't cook!"

"Oh, I can too!" JJ says, feigning hurt feelings. "I can cook just fine."

"No, no you can't. I still have nightmares about your chili." The brunette responds laughing as she moves around her kitchen and starts boiling water. Walking towards the fridge and grabbing five tomatoes, she hands JJ a knife, cutting board and says, "here chop these. Try not to ruin them."

Laughing and pleased with the friendly banter, JJ takes the tomatoes and says, "fine, I will be the sous-chef. But only because you are hurt."

"How generous of you." Emily says sarcastically as she fills a pot with water to cook the spaghetti.

They cook and chop in silence for a while, taking sometime to enjoy each other's company. Neither wanting to interrupt the friendly banter and atmosphere even though both know that they need to talk. Finally, Emily says, "Kate doesn't want me to be alone tonight."

"I can stay." JJ responded. It wasn't a hard decision to make. She also didn't want Emily to be alone and had already decided she was staying when Kate left.

Continuing her answer, as if she it was part of the conversation, JJ said, "I am breaking up with Will," and quickly followed it with, "is this size okay?" Lifting the cutting board and two chopped tomatoes.

"Perfect." Emily answered unable to stop herself from smiling. "The tomatoes, they are perfect."

They continued to chop and cook in silence. After she was done chopping the tomatoes, JJ sat back and observed Emily as she made the pasta sauce from scratch. Unable to stop staring at Emily, JJ sat comfortably on the stool and dreamed about the future; a future where this could be her life.

_They would get back from work and Emily would cook dinner. They would eat and discuss their day, drinking wine and enjoying each other's company. They would then clean the kitchen together; stealing glances and kisses while they did it. Finally, at the end of the evening, they would share a bed._ And as she looked around the apartment, dreaming of watching TV in Emily's living room, having long dinners around her breakfast bar and making love against the large window facing D.C., JJ was pulled away from her dreams by the sight of a suitcase, opened and messy by the staircase leading to Emily's bedroom.

"Where's Kate?" JJ asked, hoping that it wouldn't lead to an argument. She needed to know who Kate was to Emily; and she needed to know now.

"Surgery; heart transplant." Emily answered without looking up from the salad she was making.

"How long is she staying with you?" JJ confidently asked. _It is now or never._

"She isn't sure." Emily responded, quickly and curtly. She knew what JJ wanted to know but she found herself unwilling to relinquish her upper hand. It was obvious that JJ was jealous. It was obvious that JJ felt something for Emily. But until Emily knew what and how much, she was going to use Kate as a shield. And in an attempt to change the subject, Emily asks, "wine?"

"No." JJ answered quickly, unwilling to let go of the her line of questioning, "When will she find out?"

"I don't know." Emily answered just as quickly. "Dinner is ready." She says, with a smile, hoping to but an end to the conversation.

"Emily, we need to talk." JJ says, now looking directly at the brunette.

"I know, we do. But not now." Emily responded, also looking straight at the blonde. Reaching towards JJ's hand, Emily took her hands and gently kissed the tips of her fingers. JJ was surprised by the action but even more surprised at her response. Her whole body warmed up immediately by Emily's touch. Emily's lips were soft and felt perfect against her skin. She swallowed hard and felt her cheeks reddening.

Oblivious to JJ's physical response, Emily continued, "let's do this right. You have to deal with Will," and JJ quickly interrupted, "and you have to deal with Kate." And after a brief silence, Emily continued, "so let's do this right. Let's talk about us when there is an us to talk about."

JJ reluctantly agreed. She understood Emily's reluctance, she also didn't want to disrespect the commitment had made to Will but she wanted certainty. She wanted to know that Emily would be there when Will was gone. She wanted to push until Emily committed to her but she knew that it wasn't fair. She couldn't ask for Emily's commitment when she was still committed to another.

"Fine, you win. We'll eat." JJ answered hoping to return to the pleasant banter they had enjoyed previously.

Even though Emily avoided her questions, JJ couldn't deny that dinner was wonderful. They talked about the case, politics, work, friends, religion. Conversation flowed easily and comfortably. Emily was calm and relaxed and JJ was reminded of how much she missed this side of Emily. They held hands and touched, too much for too long and for no good reason. This was clearly the beginning of something and it was that knowledge that allowed JJ to let go of Kate and Will and her lack of certainty as to how things stood with Emily.

It was almost 3am when they finished cleaning the kitchen and said their goodnights. JJ sat on her bed in the guest room and openly smiled at the thought of Emily. She could still feel Emily's finger interlaced with her own; Emily's hands on her shoulders; Emily's hand on her leg. She could still smell Emily's hair and remembered exactly how it felt to have her hands on the brunette's hips. And relishing the feeling that soon, very soon, Emily would be hers, JJ fell asleep.

* * *

><p>"This smells so good." Kate exclaimed as she walked into the apartment and took a seat at the breakfast bar. "What are you making?"<p>

"Just omelets and some bacon. Want one?"

Violently nodding yes, Kate reaches towards the coffee pot and pours herself a cup of coffee. "How was surgery?" Emily asked tentatively.

"Fine." Kate answered, taking the first sip of her coffee and grabbing bacon off Emily's plate. Emily wanted to ask more but knew not to. Kate would have volunteered good news.

"How was Jane?" Emily asked, now less tentatively.

"She is fine. We talked. It's complicated…" Kate answered, reaching for more bacon as Emily pulled the plate away. "You get bacon when I get the story," Emily said with a smile.

"Fine!" Kate said as she reached furthered and stole another piece of bacon. "I love her; I mean, I am in love with her and she is in love with me and all that mushy crap. But I still don't want to get married and she still doesn't understand why."

"Why won't you marry her?" Emily asked though she knew the answer all too well.

"Marriage is a failed institution Emmy. It doesn't work" Kate answered taking yet another piece of bacon from Emily's plate.

"Don't over-generalize it, Kate. Our parent's marriages didn't work but that doesn't mean that the institution is a failed institution." Emily answered. Kate simply rolled her eyes, unwilling to have this conversation with Emily. They had had it many times before and neither of them was about to change their minds.

"Have you called your mother?" Kate asked, only partly to change the subject. "You need to call your mom. She is concerned about you." Now it was Emily's turn to roll her eyes. "Emmy, she loves you and worries about you." Kate said, finishing her coffee and pouring herself another cup.

Looking around the kitchen for the first time, Kate, smile spreading on her face, asked, "you are making an awful lot of food for just the two of us? Where's FBI Barbie?"

Head slightly crooked to the side, Emily says, "FBI Barbie, really? How long have you been waiting to make that joke?"

Both openly laughing, Kate answers, "a couple of days. Where is she?"

"Upstairs." Emily answers as Kate made "oooooooooooo" noises.

"Did you guys…talk?" Kate asks with a mischievous smile.

"She is in the guestroom. Yes, we talked and that is all we did. She is breaking up with Will."

"About time!" Kate exclaimed and, sitting on the breakfast bar, gives Emily a big hug and a peck on the forehead. "So, is this happy ever after for Agent Prentiss and Agent Jareau?" She asks, now with her best friend between her legs.

"We have agreed to talk about it after she deals with Will. It seemed inappropriate to have any conversations about us while she is still engaged." Emily answers now openly and obviously happy.

"Good. Okay, I am going to go to sleep so that you and Jareau can have a romantic breakfast." Kate said but before she had a chance to jump off the breakfast bar, Emily held on to her legs and, determined, said, "tell me about Jane."

In resignation, Kate explained, "she says she is willing to give up on the marriage proposal if I am willing to move in with her. She wants us to move back to the US. Memorial has offered us both jobs. I love her but I am not sure I am ready to change my life for anyone."

"What are you going to do?" Emily asked putting her arms around her friend.

"I am not sure. Can you see me moving to DC?" Kate asked truly wondering if she could do it.

"I have dreamed about you moving to DC for a decade!" Emily answered with a smile. She had dreamed of it- she missed Kate. Until the BAU, Kate was the only friend Emily had.

"What if it doesn't work, Emmy?"

"What if it does, Kate?"

"I don't believe in happy ever after." Kate said, leaning against Emily's frame.

"I do. And you will be. We will be happy ever after." Emily announced. "Trust me, Kate. Take a chance."

Desperately trying to change the subject Kate asks, "how are you feeling?" as she inspects Emily's bruises and ribs.

"Fine. Just a bit of a headache." Emily answers, wincing at what had quickly become a full medical examination.

"Your ribs are still very bruised. You shouldn't go to work today." Kate said but before Emily had a the chance to voice her disapproval of that decision, Kate continued, "its really your choice: you can go back to a hospital and have a stranger take a look at you, which will likely require them to run a full battery of exams, or you can wait another day and I will give you a doctor's note. Your call."

Knowing full well she had won the argument, Kate says, "I need to take a nap." Giving Emily a quick peck and jumping off the counter, she continued, "have breakfast with JJ and enjoy your day off. Dinner date?"

Leaning against the counter and reaching for her friend's hand, Emily answered, "yes. Dinner it is."


End file.
